Friday, June 13, 2008

My Adopted Daughter

If you know me, it is quite obvious that I didn't really adopt another daughter (I go quite crazy enough with the children I already have, thank you very much!). The below photo is of Zee-- her grandparents live across the street. Zee and her mom are here visiting from Louisiana for a month. I mentioned that Zee was welcome to come over if she saw my kids outside, so it looks like I have myself one extra kid for a month or so.

Zee is quite a character and unfortunately finds herself being treated a bit unkindly by some of the boys in the neighborhood.  Since I seem to be the only parent present they'll have to live with me reprimanding and parenting their kids. I hope we move soon to where difference is a little more the norm. The best part about Zee, though, is that she calls me Miss J. It makes me laugh every time.


Steph said...

I guess I am one of the mom's who doesn't know how to parent my kid . . .

Somehow you managed to make the situation sound like something racial. The boys were making fun of her because she had training wheels on her bike and they didn't. (rude, but normal for young children) Before you reprimanded my 4-year-old and the neighbor's 5-year-old I had already discussed the situation with them. I then followed them down the street in my car, stopped the car and watched you reprimand then, then you came over to my car and we had a chat and you gave me your phone number.

Earlier that day I had two of your children on my trampoline making fun of a different neighbor. I went out and told them that they cannot jump in my yard if they are going to make fun of others. They were fine with that and went on to play with the kid they had been making fun of for another 30 minutes or so.

That's what I love about this neighborhood. I didn't feel like you were a bad parent or neglectful because your kids were making fun of someone. I felt like kids are kids and I'm glad we can look out for one another's children. When you reprimanded my son I was glad. Sometimes it helps to hear those things from someone other than your own parents.

I'm quite surprised that you hope to move soon. Just this last week I was looking out the window watching your children and other neighborhood children riding their bikes and playing and I thought, "I hope they don't move for a long time. I really like them and their kids."

I still like you and hope you don't move soon. I know that sometimes we write things on our blogs that are not exactly how we feel or exactly what happened, but you may want to make a note:
Don't rip on the neighbors on your blog and then give them your blog address.

Mostly I just think this is funny and I hope you can also think it's funny that we actually read this.

The Laundry Queen said...

It actually wasn't meant to be about race, I guess it just seemed that way from what I wrote. I was referring to her much different personality. Zee is unlike any of the kids in the neighborhood, and I think was misunderstood. I didn't even know that any serious problems had happened until later when I learned that one boy (not yours) had actually been hitting Zee and broke her glasses. Zee's mom decided not to say anything, even though the glasses needed to be replaced.

So, I understand that all kids make fun of others, and I appreciate that you reprimanded my children when I wasn't around--but I guess the fact that the situation with Zee had escalated to physical violence (for reasons Zee did not understand) set me off a little bit. The mean treatment was not all because of the fact that she rode with training wheels, and it wasn't just something that happened once, so I guess I was just feeling bad that she was feeling so unwelcome here.

We have had a wonderful experience here, and truly love our neighbors. The reasons for our desire to move are varied, from the fact that it's too hot (or cold!), to the need for distance from a job that hasn't been the best. I wasn't trying to rip on my neighbors, but I don't always say what I mean with the most tact. ( I think that the only person I worry about offending when I write is Rophone's 101 year old grandma!)

I don't think you're a bad mom, so I'm sorry you thought I was saying that. You take your kids to the park in the 3000 degree heat while a gazillion weeks pregnant for pete's sake! That's dedication!

The Laundry Queen said...

P.S. I wasn't the one that did the big reprimanding, by the way (that was Zee's grandma, I think). The only time I talked to your boys was when you saw me.